That's it. My last day as an employee done and dusted! It feels very strange indeed. Since handing in my notice I have been lying awake at night wondering what the hell I thought I was playing at. My tummy has been doing somersaults and all I could think of was....what if I've made the biggest mistake of my life? What if I disappear behind a pile of badly written, rejected manuscripts? What if I am totally delusional and that my negative little inner voice was right all along? What if.....?
Well, to some extent, I have just had these questions answered....and before anyone says 'it could lead to nothing' I do realise that, however the most wonderful email came for me today. An agent wants to see the rest of my manuscript, with a view to representing me! She might hate it, on the other hand she might just love it. The important thing is that those first three chapters were good enough to not get rejected and bearing in mind that this is the first time I have sent anything to an agent I feel really positive about my decision to give it a go. I feel as though this small affirmation really couldn't have come at a better time. I am so excited....am I waffling?
My hubby has gone off with half pint to buy something bubbly - i'm not celebrating my success just yet, just my not stumbling at the first post!
I said 2012 would be brilliant! Start believing it!
Sunday, 15 April 2012
Back from my holiday in France where we gorged on delicious French cheese and local wine I am now raring to go...back to France mainly! We had such a lovely time even though the rain was pretty much incessant and there had been a little visitor before our arrival of the mousey variety...no I don't mean Mavis from Coronation Street!
So what now, well for those of you not on Facebook, the exciting bit of news is that I have given up my job to concentrate on writing! I know, I know...I can hear all the established writers laughing that I won't earn any money for years if, indeed, at all. However the truth of the matter is that I was only working part time and not earning very much. If I had a fantastic highly paid career maybe I would have been a little more cautious...although maybe not. After all, I am 47 now and have five children. I have either always worked or been at home with small children. With my youngest about to start full-time school I genuinely feel that this is my time to have a go. It may have been fishing, cooking, jam-making, a whole world of experiences are out there waiting and as I said at the beginning of this year....this one is MY YEAR and is going to be blooming marvellous. I promised myself that I would live outside of my comfort zone (ie not on the sofa) and that I would achieve or at least be striving to achieve some of my dreams. And to that end here I go!
I have so many positive reactions to my leap of faith that I almost feel I owe it to everyone to do the very best I can, which I most definitely intend to. I have never made big announcements before, I have just made lots and lots of silent promises to myself that I have never kept. By making a song and dance of things I am hoping it will keep me to resolutions and make a huge success in my efforts.
I am not expecting to become the next JK Rowling, Sophie Kinsella or Joanne Harris but I shall be found in my office writing as my job Monday to Friday (occasionally popping out for air and the odd cappuccino!).
Let the mockers mock, I genuinely couldn't care less. I've done my share of scrimping and scraping and know what it's like to have no money left from my wages once the bills are paid. I can live on far less than we will be living on - when my older sons were small and I was a single mum I survived on less than £80 a week!
Hopefully by this time next year I will have a finished product, maybe even an agent...who knows? What I do know is that I will enjoy getting up every morning knowing that I can sit at my desk and get lost in a few hours of writing. I can't think of anything I would rather be doing!
Finally, a big thank-you to everyone who has been so positive!